The Trolley

For those of you that have never seen a trolley, consider yourselves lucky.  In the old days this was a way of getting around, in the urban centers.  This contraption was on tracks and pulled around by horses or mules, and yes it did have an operator.  People would get on and off at leisure.  Then progress came to the urban centers and they were bigger, made of solid steel, and ran on electricity, and yes they still had an operator.   They called him operator because it would have been rude to call him moron.


The biggest problem with these steel giants was that they interfered with car traffic. They had to be on a rail, go in circles, very slow...the power lines hung from every building, from above it probably looked like a spider web.  Anyway we go rid of them.  Now there are a few of them around the world kept working for tourist.  The most famous one I guess is the one in Frisco ..... but you cant hang on the outside anymore, youll fall.  In New Orleans they had one you may have read about, "A Street Car Named Desire" .... I know....Ive never read it either.


Now our city fathers want to bring it back ..... Duh!  This time they want it to climb the mountain ..... I'm sure the energy need would be mind-boggling.  If you imagine pulling a steel trolley up a mountain for several miles, then you can imagine the price, the maintenance, the Operator, sick leave, overtime, maternity leave, moron.   


The state is willing to give us $90 million dollars .... whoa ..... that sure is nice of them.  You dont suppose they are harvesting votes?  Votes for lets say, a good looking, retired veteran, with an independent mind, but a card carrying republican to replace the discarded Kay Bailey Hutchinson.  Who operated the very first trolley.  


Now I would give it some thought if and only if it was an aerial tram.  Yes one made out of composites weighing 10X less, with those new glass windows that are 17X stronger than ordinary glass.  Pulled by a cable, like the one in Vegas.  Needless to say the view is fantastic.  And surely it would have an emergency ladder to get passengers off, Oh wait that would be a duplication....We already have fire engines with those ladders attached, we might as well use them.  


Yes city fathers, Im on my knees and this is my supplication, save us from the past and grant us the future.  To the glory of Pistolero, patron saint of El Paso, threshold to the stars.